So, I (Ashley) usually don’t blog
my personal thoughts. More about the
things we are doing and what’s going on here.
But I was reminded of this thought recently, so I thought I would share.
I think I have
discovered a phenomenon. It usually
occurs in gatherings of 6-15 people when they are eating a meal at someone’s
home. I like to call it the “No one
wants to go first in line to get their food, lest they look selfish, rude, or
even worse, hungry, so instead everyone stands close to the kitchen acting like
they are interested in the conversations they are having, while really
wondering if someone is ever going to start the line because they are getting
hungry and the food is getting cold” phenomenon. Ever experienced it? I’m so aware of it now, I’ve come to enjoy
watching this play itself out for at least a few minutes because it’s so
entertaining. Then I make a huge
sacrifice. I truly humble myself and
decide I will serve my fellow mates by going first (sometimes even at my own
house – gasp!) You can almost hear the
sighs of relief as the rest immediately fall in line. There is absolutely no shame at all in going
second or third. And going last is
almost honored as I’ve heard people say, “Oh, you had to get your food
last. Sorry about that.” What they should have said is, “Oh no! You are forced to take your first bite of
food probably 6 minutes and 27 seconds after the first person takes their first
bite! You might starve!”
Now don’t get me
wrong. I truly do understand the
motivation of most people here. Putting
others first is, after all, a very biblical concept. Paul writes in Philippians 2, “Do nothing out
of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better
than yourselves. Each of you should look
not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” I’m
hungry. You’re hungry. I’ll let you go first. Perfectly sensible. I get that.
Jesus also encourages us that, “Many who are first will be last, and the
last first.” But sometimes I think we
can twist this verse to still be about us. Person 1: “No, I insist. You go first.” Person 2: “No really, you can
go ahead.” In this silly argument, both
people are often subconsciously seeking the gratification of knowing that they
put someone else first. We think, “Scripture
says if I go first then I’ll be last!” or “I’m not being a true servant by
going first.” But I think then we’ve
actually lost of the concept of looking to the interests of others. If that person’s true interest is to NOT go
first, then why are we trying to force them to just so we can look more like a
saint?
Moments where going
first can actually serve other people are very interesting to me. Take the dreaded class speech or project presentation,
for example. Often the teacher will ask
if anyone would like to go first, which is usually followed by silence and all
eyes down because everyone knows that eye contact with a teacher means “Yes,
please. Pick me!” The students are begging one of their peers
to go first in their mind because they know that if the silence lasts too long
the teacher will arbitrarily pick some unfortunate soul. And then there’s me. Crazy goofball me. I always asked to go first! Back in my school days, I had little concern
for the relief I was supplying my friends who were so thankful that they didn’t
have to be the dreaded, awful first. I
was really just thinking, “Hey let’s get this over with and how about before my
teacher has a chance to compare my presentation with anyone else!” Looking back though, going first often helps
others out by taking a lot of the pressure off.
If we can change our mindset about situations like this, with small
simple actions, we really can serve our brothers and sisters. Be brave!
Be bold! Be the crazy one to go
first, look foolish, and potentially be embarrassed. Then you can encourage others that the
experience really wasn’t so bad and that they too will be just fine.
Now please don’t take
this concept to mean I’m suggesting that you should always go first. With a personality and constantly moving jaw
like mine, I’ve learned the hard way that I need to let others speak first, go
first, or give their opinions before mine.
But in many situations, going first can be an act of obedience that God
can use to serve those around you. Think
about all the things you are afraid of.
Think of all the potential failures you worry about. Now think of a time when you were motivated
to look past those things and try something new. There’s a good chance that you saw someone
else do it who didn’t fall flat on their face and you thought, “Hey, if they
can do it, I can do it!” Is God asking
you to be the one to do it first to motivate someone else? After all, someone always has to be first.
Why not you? Ask God today how
you can serve others by going first.
Write that book. Make that
move. Apply for that job. Do that crazy thing God has put on your
heart. And for the sake of all those
wonderful home-cooked meals that are unnecessarily being eaten cold, go first!
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